“Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ. For if anyone thinks he is something when he is nothing, he deceives himself” (Galatians 6:2-3).

On a recent drive, my family and I had an opportunity to help someone. Cognitively compromised and unprepared for the Texas heat, a man wandered alone in a rural area while we drove past him in our air-conditioned vehicle. The aid we were able to provide was greatly needed and may have saved his life. In the aftermath, though, one persistent thought overwhelmed me with conviction: I hadn’t even noticed the man. Filled with plans for the rest of the evening, mental to-do lists, and tasks that needed organizing, my brain only vaguely cataloged the sight of him stumbling along until my husband caught my attention by saying, “Did you just see that? Something isn’t right.” When he turned the car around, I understood what he meant. Something was not right, and God in His mercy gave us the ability to help make it right.

That evening as we read the parable of the Good Samaritan in our family Bible time (Luke 10:25-37), I considered those who walked past the broken man on the side of the road. Maybe they saw themselves as too good or too busy or found it too risky to help the destitute man dying on the side of the road. As I considered my own self-absorption earlier that day, I realized that the Martha mentality I carried could have been just as damaging in its effects as the pride and disregard I read into Jesus’ parable. When we walk (or drive) right past the needy, their needs go unmet, regardless of whether our actions are motivated by arrogant disdain or negligent distraction. We are surrounded daily by need and hurt, but how often do we overlook that need and fail to act?

In his letter to the Galatians, Paul warns us of this very sentiment. He calls the members of the church to carry one another’s burdens (Galatians 6:2). However, he notes that a common obstacle to doing so is pride as it can blind a believer to the needs around him. Verse 3 (NLT) says, “If you think you are too important to help someone, you are only fooling yourself. You are not that important.” Before we can assist anyone else, we must first realize the way in which our own self-absorption can distract us from doing so. How can I help someone shoulder a burden that I don’t realize they’re carrying? How am I to know what others are carrying if I’m preoccupied with my own load? What’s behind the “I’m fine, and you?” veneer of standard Sunday morning greetings? What concerns are lingering in the brains shielded by the familiar faces of my church family? How do I miss the opportunity to connect because I am too busy, too preoccupied with myself, or too lazy to make the effort?

In Galatians 6:2, we see that our bearing burdens of fellow believers will fulfill the law of Christ. Ultimately, our obligation to help others is reflective of a God who, despite being perfect and worthy of praise, has never been so consumed with His own glory that He would leave us to suffer destitute consequences, even those we rightly deserve. He reaches down into the hopeless situations of our own making and brings us up from the filthy trenches of sin into perfect and undeserved fellowship with Him. What a beautiful picture of Christlikeness unfolds when we reach out in love to carry the heavy burdens of those around us.

What does bearing one another’s burdens look like in your women’s ministry? In practice it can look many ways. Sometimes it means offering a wise word, but sometimes silence is preferable. Acts of kindness can be helpful, such as providing groceries to the overworked single mom or calling a lonely widow. While praying through the prayer list, seek an opportunity to take action. Send an encouraging text message/ email, or even better, a handwritten note. Thoughtful burden-sharing is often rooted in intentionality.

Ultimately, whatever comfort we provide others in difficult times is deeper when we are in touch with the Comforter Himself. Abiding in Christ leaves us comforted ourselves, which enables us to comfort others. As Paul writes in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4, we serve the “God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our affliction, so that we may be able to comfort those who are in any affliction, with the comfort with which we ourselves are comforted by God.” Comforting others starts with first seeking the Lord ourselves.

Prayer: God, thank You for being my Comforter and bringing me peace in the midst of difficulties. Please open my eyes to those with heavy burdens and make clear the ways in which I can help carry those burdens. Compel me toward actions that relieve and comfort those around me. Help me to look outside of my own thoughts and plans to see others who are struggling, so that I may offer them the comfort You have so graciously offered me. In Jesus’ name I pray, amen.

Begin with prayer:

• Pray for the women God would have you ask to be on your team.
• Pray for the vision statement for your women’s ministry, a statement in line with your church’s vision statement. Having a vision statement is a framework for helping you see where the women on your team can fit within the ministry.

If you are starting a new Women’s Ministry team:

• Meet individually with the women God has laid on your heart. Listen to them. See if they line up with the needs of the team and can work together with others. They don’t have to be the most spiritually mature. They need to have a good reputation and connection with people in the church. They need to be women who have their head on a swivel, looking for ways to serve those around them.
• Try to find women from all different ages/stages/areas of the church. Avoid recruiting existing cliques of women. It’s okay to ask one woman out of a group (but not the one with the strongest personality) to see how that one could fit on the team.
• Don’t play favorites. Women pick up on this trait and will compete for the spot of favorite team member. It will destroy the team.
• Ideally your team should be an odd number of women, including yourself. Five is a good number. If your team is too large, it is hard to come to a consensus on decisions and more of a challenge to lead.

If you have inherited an existing Women’s Ministry team:

• Meet individually with the women and share the vision that God has going forward  for the ministry. They may decide it is no longer an area of service for them. If so, consider that an answered prayer and move on. Don’t take it personally. Remember, this is God’s ministry.
• If the team you inherited needs more women, pray and add a woman or women from an area(s) of the church that isn’t currently represented on the team.
• Once you have your team in place, do a spiritual gifts survey and a personality survey together as a team. Discuss the results at your meeting. This helps the women get to know each other better and helps identify differences in their gifts and personalities. Knowing them will help navigate personality differences. Celebrate these differences and help the women see how God has knit the team together.

Pray and plan your calendar:

• As you begin to pray and plan your event schedule for the year, check your church calendar to make sure you are not conflicting with any other event. You want to draw as many in for the effort you are putting out. Work always in a flow with your church and pastor. The idea of Women’s Ministry is to compliment and build up the church.
• Try to vary your events so you have both social and equipping events. These days, younger women don’t want to waste their time. Make what you are planning count and be beneficial to the spiritual growth and maturity of your women. Relationships naturally happen with women when you get them together. Discipleship must be intentional. Help them discover their spiritual gifts, how to share the gospel, how to write out their testimony. Plan a missions event together like collections for pregnancy centers, back to school needs, or a clothing drive.
• Remember the five foundational components of Women’s Ministry: Glorifies, Grows, Gives, Gathers, Goes. Try to include these areas for balance. Here is the link to our website with details:

https://sbtexas.com/wp-content/uploads/2021/03/She_Stands_model_book_web.pdf

• Make the gospel central to all that you do. Share the gospel at EVERY event. The gospel is the only thing that sets our events apart from any other social gathering. There are lots of resources for learning how to share the gospel. Equip your team to be able to share the gospel and to share their testimonies. Lead by example.

General leadership principles:

• Jesus was a servant leader. His example is what we want to follow.
• Be a good listener. Remember, God gave us two ears and one mouth.
• Pray before you respond to commitment and to conflict.
• Always be working yourself out of your position by bringing someone along to take your place. This is mentorship. It may take awhile to discover who that person is. Pray, watch, and give it time.
• Be flexible and listen to the Lord daily for guidance.
• Remember, if you aim at nothing, you will hit it every time. Be bold and try new things.
• Celebrate. Share good news of what God is doing with your team and with your women at your events. Start the fire and keep it burning.

Desde hace algún tiempo, utilizo un librito que me ha ayudado a guiar a mi hija preadolescente a través de sus diversas etapas de crecimiento a la luz de la Palabra. He podido darle herramientas para glorificar a Dios desde su juventud, con la esperanza de que sepa utilizarlas para ayudarla a cultivar su interior para que sea un lugar donde habite Dios y para que sepa que su belleza interior se refleja en su exterior.

Una de las cosas que realmente aprecio de este pequeño libro es que las autoras abordan el tema de vestir modestamente para quienes somos seguidoras de Jesús.

Estas autoras son médicos, y dan una definición de modestia y una lista de tres categorías que pueden guiar a las mujeres al momento de elegir su ropa. Las autoras comparten con las mujeres que “es posible influir en los hombres por lo que vistes, lo que haces y lo que dices. La modestia es el deseo del corazón de evitar incitar a otros a pensamientos sexuales erróneos”.

A continuación, el libro comparte tres categorías de vestimenta inmodesta: demasiado, demasiado poco y demasiado ajustada.

1. “Demasiado” es cuando la forma de vestir de una mujer dice: “Mírame”.
2. “Demasiado poco” es cuando una mujer no cubre partes del cuerpo que “necesitan una modestia especial”.
3. “Demasiado ajustada” es la ropa que revela demasiado la forma del cuerpo.

Sin embargo, las autoras animan a las mujeres a que “ser modesta no debe impedirte vestirte bonita o estar guapa”.

Creo que hay chicas jóvenes e incluso mujeres cristianas adultas que necesitan que se les anime a aprender el arte y el ministerio de vestir modestamente. Necesitamos enseñar a nuestras niñas y animar a las mujeres en nuestras iglesias que la forma en que nos vestimos cuando salimos de casa afecta a los demás. Vestir modestamente parece haber decaído hasta el punto de que nuestra generación ha olvidado lo importante que es la modestia para Dios. La imagen que dan los medios de comunicación del aspecto que deben tener las mujeres ejerce una enorme influencia en la mente y la autoestima de las niñas y mujeres. Necesitamos rescatar la modestia.

La modestia es un mandato bíblico

La Palabra nos hace conscientes de que, si bien lo que hay en el interior es lo más importante (Proverbios 4:23), lo que hay en el exterior, cómo nos vestimos y nos presentamos, refleja el estado de nuestro corazón. Por alguna razón, las nuevas generaciones han desconectado el glorificar a Dios de la apariencia externa, pero la Biblia da instrucciones específicas para las mujeres. Nuestro estilo de vida y comportamiento deben glorificar a Dios, y eso incluye cómo nos vestimos. Necesitamos abordar este tema y enseñar a nuestras jóvenes que la modestia es un mandato bíblico. En Tito 2:3-5 vemos que debemos instruir y enseñar a las mujeres a ser “prudentes y castas… para que la palabra de Dios no sea blasfemada”.

La modestia glorifica a Dios

El apóstol Pablo abordó el tema de la modestia aún más directamente en 1 Timoteo 2:9 (RVA-2015): “que las mujeres se vistan con ropa decorosa, modestia y prudencia”. En esta carta a Timoteo, Pablo da instrucciones sobre cómo los creyentes deben adorar a Dios individual y corporativamente. En el contexto grecorromano en el que se escribió esta carta (a diferencia de hoy), las mujeres no llevaban ropa reveladora ni ajustada, por lo que la situación era que acudían al templo con ropa cara, peinados llamativos y joyas que llamaban la atención sobre su aspecto exterior. ¿Cómo se aplica esto a nosotros hoy? Pablo no está diciendo que dejemos de vestirnos bien o de ponernos joyas bonitas, sino que cuando lo hagamos, no caigamos en la tentación de llamar la atención hacia nosotras mismas, sino que mantengamos toda la atención en Dios. La modestia y la humildad nos llevan a la discreción, la moderación y el equilibrio, y el Espíritu Santo puede guiarnos a ello.

La modestia es un llamado

Seamos de influencia de ejemplo y palabra en las próximas generaciones. Al igual que Pablo consideró importante abordar esta situación, nosotros también deberíamos hacerlo. Comencemos con nosotras mismas y permitamos que el Espíritu Santo nos revele dónde no estamos cumpliendo con este llamado a la modestia. Hablen de esto con sus niñas, jovencitas y damas en sus conversaciones, en el estudio de la Biblia, y en cada oportunidad porque el mundo (películas, redes sociales, YouTube, y más) les enseña lo contrario todos los días.

Es importante que sepan cómo rechazar las presiones de la sensualidad, el consumismo y las apariencias de las que tal vez ni siquiera sean conscientes. Las mujeres no tienen que revelar demasiado para vestir a la moda. No tienen que exhibir sus cuerpos para probarse a sí mismas ante los demás o para ser alabadas. No tienen que ser provocativas para conquistar, y mucho menos lucir cosas muy costosas para impresionar. Lo único que necesitan es agradar a Dios y buscar glorificarlo, aunque les cueste renunciar a algunas cosas que les gustan por Jesús.

No somos perfectas, ni tampoco nuestras jovencitas. Yo tuve mis épocas de jovencita en las que no sabía cómo elegir un atuendo que glorificara a Dios, pero siempre tuve el consejo de mis padres y el ejemplo de mi madre y de líderes de la iglesia, algo que Dios usó como referencia para guiarme. Nuestras chicas pueden cometer errores, pero debemos animarlas a evaluar este aspecto de sus vidas, como yo lo tuve que hacer una vez.

Hacernos estas preguntas necesarias cada día antes de salir por la puerta será la clave para glorificar a Dios con nuestra apariencia.

1. ¿Estoy glorificando a Dios con esta ropa?

No estoy hablando de una falda, pantalones, o una pieza especifica porque algunas faldas son tan apretadas o cortas que es mejor usar pantalones. Este es un buen momento para usar las tres categorías anteriores.

2. ¿Podría esta ropa hacer que otros tengan malos pensamientos?

Seamos claros: no somos responsables de lo que piensan los demás ni de dónde van sus mentes, pero sí podemos ser responsables de no invitarles o incitarles a pensar mal.

3. ¿Podría esta ropa ser un obstáculo para lo que Dios quiere hacer hoy? Tan extremo o fanático como esto pueda parecerle, me he encontrado muchas veces parada frente a mi armario preguntándole a Dios qué debo vestir para una ocasión, y he aprendido a ser intencional acerca de representarlo bien en los eventos. Hay momentos para ser simple o casual, momentos para usar algo elegante o vibrante, y Dios puede ayudarnos a ser asertivos para cualquier ocasión o lugar.

Mi esperanza es que seas animada, aunque sólo sea a orar por ello, y que Dios te anime a seguir mejorando, a estar atenta a Su voz y a seguirle. También espero que puedas comenzar a dar pasos para influenciar a otras mujeres y niñas a glorificar a Dios en todas las áreas de sus vidas, pero no olvides hacerlo en amor y con mucha gracia.

Y recuerda siempre que, aunque cultivar nuestra belleza interior es una prioridad, el exterior puede ser un reflejo de tu transformación interior. La mujer modesta glorifica a Dios.

“Engañosa es la gracia y vana la hermosura, pero la mujer que teme (honra, respeta, reverencia, obedece) al Señor, esa será alabada” (Proverbios 31:30).

For some time now, I have been using a little booklet that has helped me guide my preteen daughter through her various stages of growth in the light of the Word. I have been able to give her tools to glorify God from her youth, hoping she will know how to use them to help her cultivate her inner self to be a place where God dwells and to know that her inner beauty is reflected in her outer self.

One of the things I really appreciate about this little book is that the authors address the topic of dressing modestly for those of us who are followers of Jesus.

These authors are physicians, and they give a definition of modesty and a list of three categories that can guide women in choosing clothing styles. The authors share with women that “it is possible to influence men by what you wear, what you do, and what you say. Modesty is the heart’s desire to avoid leading others to wrong sexual thoughts.”

The booklet then shares three categories of immodest dress—too much, too little, and too tight.

• “Too much” is when a woman’s way of dressing says, “Look at me.”
• “Too little” is when a woman doesn’t cover body parts that “need special modesty.”
• “Too tight” refers to clothes that reveal too much of the body’s shape.

Yet the authors encourage women that “being modest should not stop you from dressing prettily or looking beautiful.”

I believe there are young girls and even adult Christian women who need to be encouraged to learn the art and ministry of dressing modestly. We need to teach our girls and encourage women in our ministries that the way we dress when we leave the house affects others. Dressing modestly seems to have declined to the point that our generation has forgotten how important modesty is to God. Media’s portrayal of how women should look exerts tremendous influence on girls’ and women’s minds and self-esteem. We need to rescue modesty.

Modesty is a Biblical Mandate

The Word makes us aware that while what is on the inside is most important (Proverbs 4:23), what is on the outside, how we dress and present ourselves, reflects the state of our heart. For some reason, new generations have disconnected glorifying God from outward appearance, but the Bible gives specific instructions for women. Our lifestyle and behavior should glorify God, and that includes how we dress. We need to address this issue and teach our young women that modesty is a biblical mandate. In Titus 2:3-5 we see that we must instruct and teach women to be “self-controlled and pure… so that the word of God may not be reviled.”

Modesty Glorifies God

The apostle Paul addressed the issue of modesty even more directly in 1 Timothy 2:9: “women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control.” In this letter to Timothy, Paul gives instructions on how believers should worship God individually and corporately. In the Greco-Roman context in which this letter was written (unlike today), women did not wear revealing or tight-fitting clothing, so the issue was that they came to the temple with expensive clothes, flashy hairstyles, and jewelry that drew attention to their outward appearance. How does this apply to us today? Paul is not saying that we should stop dressing up or putting on pretty jewelry, but that when we do, we should not be tempted to draw attention to ourselves, but instead keep all the attention on God. Modesty and humility lead us to discretion, moderation, and balance, and the Holy Spirit can guide us to that.

The Calling to Modesty

Let us influence the next generations by example and words. As Paul found it important to address this issue, so should we. Let’s start with ourselves and allow the Holy Spirit to reveal where we are not fulfilling this call to modesty. Bring this up with your girls and ladies in your conversations, in Bible study, and at every opportunity because the world (movies, social media, YouTube, and more) teaches them the opposite every day.

It is important that they know how to reject the pressures of sensuality, consumerism, and appearances that they may not even be aware of. Women don’t have to reveal too much to dress fashionably. They don’t have to display their bodies to prove themselves to others or to be praised. They don’t have to be provocative to conquer, much less to impress. The only thing they need is to please God and seek to glorify Him, even if it costs them giving up some things they like for Jesus.

We are not perfect, nor are our young ladies. I had my times as a young girl when I didn’t know how to choose an outfit that glorified God, but I always had the advice of my parents and the example of my mother and church leaders, something that God used to guide me. Our girls may make mistakes, but we should encourage them to evaluate this aspect of their lives, as I once had to do.

Asking ourselves these necessary questions every day before we walk out the door will be the key to glorifying God with our appearance.

1. Am I glorifying God with this outfit?

I am not talking about a skirt, pants, or anything specific because some skirts are so tight or short that it is better to wear pants. This is a good time to use the three categories above.

2. Could this clothing cause others to have bad thoughts?

Let’s be clear—we are not responsible for what others think and where their minds go, but we can be responsible for not inviting or inciting them to wrong thinking.

3. Could this clothing be an obstacle to what God wants to do today? As extreme or fanatical as this may seem to you, I have found myself standing in front of my closet many times asking God what I should wear for an occasion, and I have learned to be intentional about representing Him well at events. There are times to be simple or casual, times to wear something fancy or vibrant, and God can help us be assertive for any occasion or place.

My hope is that you will be encouraged, even if it is only to pray about it, and that God will encourage you to continue to improve, to be attentive to His voice, and to follow Him. I also hope you can begin to take steps to influence other women and girls to glorify God in all areas of their lives, but don’t forget to do it in love and with much grace.

And always remember that while cultivating our inner beauty is a priority, the outside can be a reflection of inner transformation. The modest woman glorifies God.

“Grace is deceitful and beauty is vain, but the woman who fears (honors, respects, reveres, obeys) the Lord will be praised” (Proverbs 31:30).

We all hear about it. Maybe we have even let it happen in our own lives—godly women walk away from the church. Sometimes it’s because needs are not being met. Other times it is due to a lack of serious discipleship—women don’t understand the importance of attending church regularly. I’m sure we’ve all seen women who struggle with overcommitment in various areas of life. But sadly, I’ve also heard of women who felt an inability to use their spiritual gifts, or those who’ve just faced feelings of being disconnected and generally overwhelmed. And worst of all, there are women who have been hurt and simply feel like calling it quits on the church.

So, what can we do to help a woman who is tempted to walk away? How can we encourage her to stay?

We must understand our women. Understanding is important for any woman in the church, but especially when there is a generation gap. We must make an effort. How can we bring women back and encourage them to stay if we don’t understand their lives, their struggles, and their needs? Intergenerational friendships are important. Ideas for bridging the generational gap go beyond the scope of this article, but we need to be creative. Many younger women have expressed the desire to get to know the older ladies of the church and vice versa. (If your church succeeds here, kudos.) When we understand the women in our church, no matter their ages, needs can be met, serious discipleship developed, and both pain and overcommitment in life can be addressed. Understanding breeds compassion.

Allow women to serve. It feels so good to use the gifts God has given. If you are a leader, consider offering spiritual gifts assessments and catalog the results. Then invite each woman to serve in roles where she can use her gifts—either regularly or periodically, depending on the need and on the woman. As women serve, they will feel more connected. If you are not a leader, discover your gifts and then seek opportunities to serve in your church. Talk to your women’s ministry leader or your pastor. Remember, feelings of being overwhelmed are often alleviated when women develop friendships and find a supportive, helpful group in which to serve.

As you have noticed, this year the SBTC Women’s Ministry is focusing on returning “Back to the Basics.” One of our basics is to glorify God. We can do this through personal and corporate worship, prayer, and living in obedience and submission to God. We follow the wisdom and instruction of the Bible, God’s holy Word to us. And we encourage other women to do the same. When women feel like walking away, we glorify God by encouraging them stay.

Not every woman who walks away (or feels like walking away) from church attendance is walking away from God. However, those who do leave are not obeying His command to continue meeting with other believers, to continue in worshipful Christian community (Acts 2:42, 46-47; Hebrews 10:25). The goal is to encourage women to stay before they throw in the towel. And when possible, we must warmly reach out to those who have left, inviting them back. While we wait and pray, we must focus on understanding and meeting the needs of women in our church. When we do this successfully, they will invite others to join in. Where women are being fed, others will gather. Focus on the women beside you and glorify God together.

It is June already, and I am on Day 46 of my Bible reading plan when I should be on Day 127. I have missed my goal by 81 days.

I don’t know about you, but I have lost count of the number of times I have set a goal and failed to carry it through. Several days ago, I intended to finish folding laundry. I have yet to take the clothes out from the dryer. I wanted to defrost the chicken and marinate it so when I got home I could easily pop it in the oven. I got as far as opening the freezer to take the chicken out, but I needed to rearrange stuff to reach the chicken, and by the time I was done rearranging, I needed to race out the door, but the chicken was still in the freezer. On my way home, I stopped by the grocery store to pick up vegetables to go with the chicken. I remembered I also needed bacon and eggs for breakfast. When I got home, I had everything, except the vegetables for the chicken.

Isn’t this just like life? We make goals with deadlines, but often something else competes with those goals, and before we know it, we are overtaken by those other things. We come up with a to-do list and write it down, but it has to compete with the one we have in our minds. We think one thing, but we end up doing something else.

Paul struggled with a similar issue. In Romans 7:18b, he said this about keeping up with the Law: “For I have the desire to do what is right, but not the ability to carry it out.” Paul struggled with keeping up with his to-do list as far as the Law was concerned. He had the desire, but not the ability to do it. Paul realized the solution to his dilemma was in his relationship with Christ. Paul helps us see the truth that we can desire all we want, but on our own, we are incapable of accomplishing our desires.

Going back to the basics of our personal relationship with Christ is key. While it is important to keep up with our Bible reading plan, while it helps to have the laundry folded on time, and while it is necessary to get that chicken out of the freezer and marinate it and get it ready for the oven and get the vegetables to go with it, where we begin makes all the difference.

Jesus said, “Abide in me, and I in you. As the branch cannot bear fruit by itself, unless it abides in the vine, neither can you, unless you abide in Me” (John 15:4). Jesus said these words to His disciples as He prepared to leave them. He knew, even good things would compete with their time, and they would need to choose. But the one thing they could not compromise was their personal relationship with Christ. They needed to abide in Him if they were going to bear fruit in all areas of their lives.

So is it with us—our responsibility is to abide in Christ. We read the Bible, not to quickly finish, but to find God in those pages. As we grow in our knowledge of Him, He teaches us how to pace ourselves. We plan our days, take care of our homes and our families, and when things don’t turn out the way we planned, we must continue to focus on abiding in Christ.

How about you? How is your personal relationship with God? Have you come to the place of abiding, where you know that it is not how much you accomplish, but how dependent you are on God as you go deep with Him? Are you more concerned about checking the box or making the deadline, or are you first seeking to grow your intimacy with God the Father, God the Son, and God the Holy Spirit? Laundry, frozen chicken, and to-do lists have value, but abiding in Christ is vital.

Working with people generates some of our biggest blessings in church and ministry life. However, working with people also creates some of the biggest obstacles to church and ministry life. I remember my mother-in-law joking that many of us could be really holy people if we didn’t have to deal with church people. And, I have found myself more than once pleading with the Lord to just move So-and-So out of my circle so I could have more peace.

Have you been there? I’m sure you’ve felt that way too. The longer you stay plugged into a church family, the more likely it is that you are going to run into people who get right under your skin. They often think, respond, and behave so differently than you that you’re tempted to throw your hands up and walk away from church altogether.

What is it that makes me feel like fire is running through my veins when “Karen” tells me she didn’t bring the group materials to Bible study? She said she was out having dinner with an old friend and just completely forgot. Forgot? I would never dream of forgetting something so important.

Or it’s when the pastor announces that he needs everyone to help host a large block party. You could be thrilled at the possibility of making new friends. Everyone loves a party, right? Or you could be completely exhausted just thinking about the idea of mixing with so many strangers. Nope, this is not for you. You’ll just stay home where it’s quiet and calm.

We all have different personalities and preferences, sure, but what I want us to dive into today goes so much deeper. The Bible tells us in Psalm 139 that “God knit us together in our mother’s womb.” It is here in this intricate weaving that God begins to thread through four different fibers that color and impact our inner workings. Those four fibers are—introverted, extroverted, task oriented, and people oriented. Once these strands are stitched into the tapestry of you, depending on their combination and abundance, they greatly influence your perceptions and behaviors. Let’s take a closer look at these four threads and the traits formed by their different combinations.

Our extroverted friends who are people oriented are the ones who keep us thoroughly entertained and motivated. They love a good party, bring lots of energy to their interactions, and are very creative. When working with people who fall into this category, remember that eye contact, listening well, and positive responses build good communication. These friends are greatly influenced by the suggestions of others and can easily get carried away with all the fun details. Remember, their goal is to entertain you. In my earlier example, when “Karen” forgot the Bible study materials, it’s not that she didn’t care about the Bible study; it’s that her love for people and her ability to be flexible and spontaneous impact her priorities and decisions. She may have decided she could easily come up with questions during Bible study, which would give her more time with her friend and still generate meaningful conversations within the Bible study group. To work effectively with people who are extroverted and people-oriented, praise them for their positive attributes while privately offering suggestions and constructive feedback. Above all, if they feel loved and accepted, they are more likely to work easily with you and your group.

Extroverted people who are task-oriented are very decisive and can share those ideas easily and effectively. They exude confidence and are oftentimes natural leaders.  These friends are highly motivated and carry a natural sense of responsibility for those around them. However, they can seem rude when they don’t let others share ideas. They can come across as bossy or opinionated, and they often question the authority of others. When I work with these types of people, I often give them at least one area of responsibility they can control. They feel valued when their hard work is recognized, so saying thank you and listing specific ways they positively contributed build goodwill into the relationship. Overall, people who are extroverted and task-oriented want to know you support and value their contributions.

Now, let’s look at people who are more introverted. Individuals who are introverted and people oriented naturally draw others to themselves through their sense of calm. They absolutely love working with others, so they are positive additions to any team. Peace and harmony are very important to this person, so any conflict or tension between people can easily bring worry. They are often known for being very considerate and sensitive to the emotional and/or physical needs of another person. When working with someone who is introverted and people oriented, we need to remember to make room for them to share their opinions. Many times a person who has this make-up doesn’t readily offer their opinion, which can be interpreted as a lack of care or enthusiasm, but these individuals greatly desire to be included in the conversation.  Altogether, we need to provide opportunities for them to lead and then give them space to retreat and recover.

Lastly, we have those who are introverted and task oriented. These people are phenomenal problem solvers. They appreciate the ability to think long and hard about a subject before speaking or acting. This tendency can be misconstrued as being hesitant or unable to act. They often need time and support to thoroughly prepare their response. People with this makeup thrive on planning and detail. When working with these individuals, it’s very important to stick to the original plan as much as possible and communicate changes early. Being given time and space to process and adapt combats their tendency to worry. Most importantly, encouraging these individuals to rise to a challenge and giving them needed space to plan will produce beautiful fruit.

The diversity that God creates within our innate weavings makes our church communities rich. In Genesis, we are told that God made man “in His image” (Genesis 1:26-27). It’s such a beautifully intimate picture. God laces into our makeup the different threads of introverted, extroverted, people oriented, and task oriented because He is all these things in perfect combination. Although working with others can at times feel like rough sandpaper across my skin, God allows these variations to knock off the rough parts of my inner man. These interactions challenge my selfish, prideful nature and provide opportunities to cultivate humility and generosity. Instead of worrying about how something will get accomplished, I can lean into prayer and watch how God answers my petitions through others in my church family.

In this Christian walk, God is growing me into the image of His Son, Jesus.  When I choose to understand how God made others, instead of balking at their outlandish ideas, quiet natures, or lack of follow through, I can celebrate that God wove them together intentionally, purposefully, and for my benefit. It is here that the beautiful tapestry of God’s full nature is shown through the church.

Our focus this year is “Back to the Basics,” and one of the basic parts of the Christian life is giving. She gives is one of the core components of our women’s ministry model that is available to download and print for free.

One definition of the word give is “to freely transfer the possession of something to someone, or to hand over.” I am drawn to that definition of freely transferring possession of something. God’s people were commanded to give offerings for sacrifices to atone for sins. The commands were rigorous and specific. In the wilderness, the people gave to help outfit the Tabernacle and provide all the special tools and apparel for the priests. Later, King David exhorted the people to give “for the service of the House of God,” the temple Solomon would build. And did the people ever give! Gold, silver, bronze, iron, and semi-precious stones were given in abundance. First Chronicles 29:9 says, “Then the people rejoiced because they had given willingly, for with a whole heart they had offered freely to the Lord. David the king also rejoiced greatly.”

I am convicted by that description of the Israelites’ giving “willingly,” “with a whole heart,” and “freely” because that describes the kind of giver I want to be. When giving is mentioned in church today, people automatically think about money. I certainly believe that Christians should give money. My husband is a pastor, and our livelihood depends on the generosity of God’s people. In 2nd Corinthians 9:6-8, Paul exhorts the people to give and reiterates the spiritual principle of sowing and reaping either sparingly or bountifully, telling the church that God loves a cheerful giver. Paul teaches that we should not give reluctantly or under compulsion. Sometimes though I think it is a far easier thing to give money than to give my time in ministry efforts or to give my emotional energy to be in relationship with and care for people in need around me. Committing to teach a children’s class weekly, or entering into a mentor or discipleship relationship, or walking closely with a friend through an illness or divorce can all be very costly in terms of time and energy. As I examine my heart, do I willingly, freely, enthusiastically, and joyfully choose to give to the Lord by giving both money and time in ministry?

My dad was an example of a super abundant, cheerful giver. He always taught my sisters and me that you can’t out give God. I remember him saying, “God doesn’t need your money, but you need God’s blessings that come when you give.” My parents both had a generosity of spirit as evidenced by opening their home, hearts, and wallets to support churches, ministries, and missionaries. Their lives bore out the principle of Malachi 3:10, which says, “Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of host, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need.” My parents gave faithfully, and I witnessed how God poured out blessings as a result. I very rarely remember cars breaking down or appliances having to be replaced. My dad was a schoolteacher and later an administrator, so he never was a rich man, but I observed his abundant generosity to a level that almost didn’t make sense. My dad knew the secret that none of it was his anyway. Psalm 89:11 states, “The heavens are Yours, the earth is also Yours; the world and all it contains, You have founded them.” What a gift my father gave me by teaching me that everything—my time, my money, my talents, even my very life—is not mine at all but belongs to God. When I pair that knowledge with the fact that God gave first and gave Jesus so that I can have eternal life and abundant life here, how can I not be a giver?

When I get tired and don’t feel excited about preparing the Bible lesson for the 3rd-5th graders on Wednesday evenings or I groan at the thought of spending the evening listening to a friend who is hurting, I only need to turn and consider the cross and what Jesus did for me. How can I not be humbled and then rejoice that I GET to do ministry?

My prayer is that as we continue this journey, we will see every avenue the Lord opens to us for ministry as a new opportunity to rejoice because we give “willingly . . . with a whole heart . . . offered freely to the Lord.” What and where is God asking you to give today?

Sometimes our life is moving so quickly that even those of us who have been believers a long time forget the real meaning of the basic spiritual disciplines. How long has it been since you contemplated all the facets of a true prayer time where you not only talked to God but also listened? What about Bible study? Do you meditate on the Word or just read it to check a box? Sometimes we take for granted the basics of our Christian faith and forget the depth and power they can bring into our lives through the Holy Spirit.

For example, what do you think when you hear the word “worship”? Many of us may immediately think of the music before the sermon. Or we may be enamored with the newest musical groups and composers and make sure that we attend their concerts. We may even think we have worshiped just by going to the concert. Music certainly can prepare us to hear from the Lord. Many times while singing, I have been brought to tears contemplating all that God has done for me. However, I have realized that it is not just the singing and raising of my hands that is worship—it is the fact that the music has made me contemplate who Jesus really is and what He has done for me personally. When that realization comes over me, I worship. 

In Scripture, we see examples of true worship and why it occurs. In Isaiah 6:1-7, Isaiah sees God in a vision. Verses 4-5 express Isaiah’s reaction in detail:

4 And the foundations of the thresholds shook at the voice of him who called, and the house was filled with smoke. 5 And I said: “Woe is me! For I am lost; for I am a man of unclean lips, and I dwell in the midst of a people of unclean lips; for my eyes have seen the King, the Lord of hosts!”

When Isaiah saw the holiness of God, he immediately realized his own sinfulness and was humbled. He worshiped a holy God.

In Revelation 5:6-14, John shares with us the reaction of all of heaven when they realize they are seeing Jesus, the Lamb of God. Verses 13-14 describe the scene:

13 And I heard every creature in heaven and on earth and under the earth and in the sea, and all that is in them, saying, 

“To him who sits on the throne and to the Lamb
be blessing and honor and glory and might forever and ever!”

14 And the four living creatures said, “Amen!” and the elders fell down and worshiped.

You may say, “Well, those are visions from God. Of course they fell down and worshipped. I would, too!” Let’s look at what the Gospel of Luke tells us about some fishermen. In Luke 5:1-11, the writer says that three or four fishermen who had been out fishing all night on the Sea of Galilee had caught nothing. They pulled their boats onto the shore and began washing their nets while Jesus taught nearby. After teaching the crowd, Jesus told Simon to push the boat into the deep water and cast his nets again. Reluctantly, Simon obeyed. Lo and behold, the nets were so full Simon had to ask his friends for help to pull them in. The two boats almost sank because of the number of fish. What was Simon’s reaction? Verses 8-10 tell us: 

8 But when Simon Peter saw it, he fell down at Jesus’ knees, saying, “Depart from me, for I am a sinful man, O Lord.” 9 For he and all who were with him were astonished at the catch of fish that they had taken, 10 and so also were James and John, sons of Zebedee, who were partners with Simon.” 

Each time there is a realization of who Jesus is, worship follows. The disciples were so moved they left everything to follow Him. Worship is total surrender to Christ the King, realization of who He really is, and following Him at all costs. 

Take some time and contemplate what you believe about worship. Are you chasing worship, or are you chasing the King of Kings and Lord of Lords? When we truly see Him, worship will follow.